[The Vl'hurgs]

Vl'hurg Imperial Photo Gallery

Dongola Race, summer 1986

This is from the Mail on Sunday magazine dated August 17, 1986. Deep in the intestines of a Betelgeusian slime-eating lizard our masters gave the order that we were to partake in a bizarre earth-ritual known as a "Dongola Race". We naturally did our best, but only got to the second round before we were eliminated. The orange smoke being emitted by Admiral J'Lee is to release toxins that had built up in her body through her exertions. The rest of us just dealt with these by subsequently imbibing a blend of ethanol, water and various earth-flavorings.

Bow to stern: 1. Admiral Jennyk Rasner, 2. His Most Imperial Highness the Glorious Emperor of the Vl'hurgs, 3. The Imperial Poet-Master D'Nee HN'Ree, 4. Vice Admiral Paretz', 5. Admiral J'Lee and 6. Captain Daveb Alding.

Note black jewelled battle shorts being sported by His Imperial Highness.

Dongola Race 1987

This is the inter-college Dongola Regatta the following year (1987). David Balding at the stern (as before), Chris Oakley (the emperor), Steve Hoey, Gilly Filsner and at the bow, a newcomer, Martin Hartigan. All from Trinity College.

Group Photograph, 11 Nov 1983

A dinner at Trinity College hall, 11 November 1983. L to R: C. Ward Parshall, James Graham-Eagle, Raymond Paretzky, Steve Wilkinson, John Board, Guy Coughlan, Jo Zuk, Chris Oakley, Tim Macintosh-Smith, Catherine Lassila, Fiona Little, Nick Kalivas, Domenica Freedman, Heather Warren.

The Kalivas with Judicial Nose

Vice-Admiral Warren had transgressed Vl'hurg law by calling the Vl'hurgs "fairly frivolous" when delivering a sermon in the chapel (she was training to be a Methodist minister). It was therefore our solemn duty to convene a Vl'hurg court. The Kalivas, sporting his judicial nose, reads the charges. I cannot remember what the outcome was, but I have no doubt that she would have seriously regretted it.

Heather Warren

The accused, apparently unconcerned at the levity of her predicament.

Vl'hurg dinner, 1984

After a Vl'hurg dinner, 30 November 1984. At the back, Grahame Blair, Chris Oakley. Next row: Catherine Lassilla, Raymond Paretzky, Mary Spyropoulos, Jo Zuk (obscured), Steve Wilkinson, John Whitworth and an Australian friend of Guy Coughlan, whose name I do not recall. Note customised bow tie.

Honorary Degree

June 1985. Admiral J'Lee and the Emperor present the earth-author, Douglas Adams with an honorary degree. Embarrassingly, Mr. Adams seems not to understand the Vl'hurgian script written thereon. The emperor issues the following declaration:

"Be it known to all and sundry that I, Dipso, Emperor of the Vl'hurgs, together with the other survivors of the Earth landing party, do honour the noble Cosmic Historian Douglas Adams. Be it know that He of Highest Esteem, whose mother is revered throughout our galaxy, has been deemed fit to hold the highest honour our Universities may bestow upon an alien. Douglas Adams, you are hereby presented with this scroll, the hallowed parchment of the Degree of Doctor of Cosmic Law."

Note the impressive imperial gut on the right (now even more impressive): the visible evidence of many a Carbon Tetrachloride binge.